Speeding: It's On The Nose

I hope that all of you already use the "on the nose" gesture that I've spent the last ten years trying to popularize - right elbow out, right index finger tapping the tip three or four times. I have only this little blog to spread my gesture's word - the Australian government has so many more resources at their disposal (like, a million blogs!), it's no wonder their gesture caught on so quickly.

The "little finger" gesture is meant to be given to speeders in lieu of other, more traditional fingers. Rather than anger or annoyance, it's meant to imply that the speeder...uh...has a small organ. While it sounds like an 8th-grade game and is clearly less effective when used at female speeders, it meets all the qualifications of a good driving gesture - quick, easy, widely understood (in Australia, anyway). And based on this article, effective.

Simon Jardak was fined $400 by a magistrate yesterday after an accusatory finger on the Anzac Bridge enraged him so much he threw a plastic bottle out of his car window, hitting the gesturing woman's car.

Jardak blamed his malicious damage charge on the RTA's anti-speeding campaign, in which hoons are mocked with wagging little fingers, suggesting they have tiny penises.


I'm a long-time wisher that there was a commonly-understood hand signal for "I'm sorry, dude - that was 100% my fault, and I recognize and acknowledge that." It would prevent so much anger on the highways and byways - frankly, I think a public awareness campaign in our country is in order. Now we just need a gesture to use. George Bush, if you're reading this, don't use the "index finger on the nose" for the apology campaign - it's already been assigned.

1 comment:

Spice said...

That is cool. I've long wished for such a gesture - not as far as the finger, but still getting the point across. Although one time when I was driving to work in the BA, I gave the guy behind me the finger, and he gave me the finger, and then we hilariously started giving the finger to each other in increasingly humorous ways (dancing, etc.), and that was kind of fun.

Yeah, we do need a "OMG, I'm sorry, I'm not an a*hole, that was an honest mistake!" gesture. The other day some woman honked at me for absolutely no reason and I started waving my hands around exasperatedly (the current way I do the non-finger), and she gave me the sheepish wave, and that just made me more annoyed. It turns out we were both making a run for the border to get our free tacos, and I was so tempted to call her out when we were standing in line but decided not to escalate the situation.